Bittersweet
by DataIntegrationThoughtEntity
Summary: She never knew their absence would pain her so much. She never knew anything could hurt this much. Songfic, Animeverse.


Author's Notes: It's been so long since my last update on anything

**Author's Notes:** It's been so long since my last update on anything. I flipped through some of my work, and is that _**deterioration **_I see in my writing instead of improvement? I found that truly pathetic. So I am going to write a pathetic not-well-though-out-at-all songfic just because it's the first bit of inspiration I've encountered in MONTHS. And even if the idea is crap (lol, WHAT idea?! This is just babbling…), I'm writing it. And that's that.

Anyhow, this complete randomness was inspired by Within Temptation. And even though the lyrics seem kinda irrelevant now that I read through them a second time... it's really all I've got.

**Disclaimer: **Do I look like I own Rozen Maiden? Lol, cause I don't. This work of fiction is unofficial.

_If I tell you  
Will you listen?  
Will you stay?  
Will you be here forever?  
Never go away? _

She never knew their absence would pain her so much. She never knew anything could hurt this much. She had her moments, but overall, she lived a good, cheerful life. And she had liked it like that. Things would happen, but she had never suffered such loss before.

And she didn't know what to do anymore.

Souseiseki had always handled the problems. She'd been reliable. You didn't have second thoughts entrusting tasks to her. But this time, it was her fault. She wasn't there. And her sister didn't know what to do, what she _could_ do.

It wasn't fair. She had tried to get Souseiseki to stay. She had tried enforcing her view on her. But she had failed. As an older sister, and as a friend. __

Never thought things would change  
Hold me tight  
Please don't say again  
That you have to go 

It was the biggest mistake of her life. She had thought everything was alright, that they'd get through it together, somehow. How naïve of her. She should have seen the signs; she shouldn't have been so surprised. A part of her wanted to condemn Souseiseki for her decision, but she couldn't. She was older, and yet it was Souseiseki who did all the comforting. And where was she when her sister was so internally conflicted?

The Gardener finally understood what Shinku had felt about Suigintou. But even then, she hadn't known. Why was she so useless? Why couldn't she tell when someone she cared about was hurt? It wasn't until Jun had mentioned something that she had realized. __

A bitter thought  
I had it all  
But I just let it go  
Hold your silence  
It's so violent  
Since your gone 

It did hurt to lose a sister. She regretted her attitude towards Hinaichigo. It was all in good fun, and her intentions had never been that bad, but sometimes she went too far. If they could have just a few more moments together, she'd apologize. The house was so incredibly quiet without her cheerfulness. It had been annoying, but... lively. And now she was in her box unmoving, and Laplace still had her Rosa Mystica, for all they knew.

Laplace. He'd always kept them in the dark about everything. It was more than irritating. Suiseiseki wasn't hateful, but she came close with Laplace. That rabbit…__

All my thoughts are with you forever  
Until the day we'll be back together  
I will be waiting for you 

It wasn't directly Laplace's fault either. The mischievous rabbit had a hand in this, but...

Enju and Barasuishou had started the battle. They had been responsible for all the ensuring fights.

Suigintou had been the one who had actually taken Souseiseki's Rosa Mystica, but it was hard to hold a grudge against her. She had caused a lot of trouble for them, but in the end she was just another victim of the Alice Game. Souseiseki had explained it to her once. Explained what had happened between her and Shinku. It was odd, but it somehow almost justified Suigintou's actions... or at least made them understandable. __

If I had told you  
You would have listened  
You had stayed  
You would be here forever  
Never went away  
It would never have been the same  
All our time  
Would have been in vain  
Cause you had to go  


The Alice Game was cruel. The elder twin loved Rozen, she truly did, but just because she did didn't mean she had to approve of his ideas. Father wanted an Alice. They all understood that, but she couldn't hurt anyone for that to happen. They would be respecting Father's wishes, but what of themselves? She couldn't be being selfish by relinquishing the title of Alice, could she?

Father loved them. He longed for an Alice, but he loved them. They could feel it. After all, he had repaired them after the fight, hadn't he? She had entered that battle, fully prepared to meet the same fate as her sister, not caring anymore. But what was Rozen's reason for leaving Souseiseki and Hinaichigo's Rosa Mysticae with Laplace? Yet another thing that Suiseiseki couldn't bring herself agree with, just like the Alice Game.

Because they were fairly defeated in battle, by someone other than Barasuishou? It was hardly fair. But Father had his own way of thinking, and his perspective greatly differed from most.

_  
The sweetest thought  
I had it all  
Cause I did let you go  
All our moments  
Keep me warm  
When you're gone _

If only he wasn't so hard to understand. If only she knew more about him. She felt his love, but if only she could really get to know him. Why did he have to be so distant?

He moved in mysterious ways, changing their lives. He had repaired Suigintou more than once though. He had given her another chance, for his own reasons.

Even Father couldn't fully repair the soul. She was physically fine, but even now, a huge part of her was missing. The watering can wasn't complete without the shears. They were made to be used together, but that wasn't possible now._  
_

_All my thoughts are with you forever  
Until the day we'll be back together  
I will be waiting for you_

Her sisters were both in their boxes at the movement. Anyone who didn't know better would've thought they were just very-well made dolls. They would've never guessed that they had once been living, moving.

She looked over at them. It was still a curious feeling, a concept hard to grasp. That they were so close to her, yet so distant…

Suiseiseki had let both her younger sister and Hinaichigo go, watching powerlessly. Was she wrong to hope for Rozen to repair her mistakes?

**Author's Notes: **That… was… not exactly the best thing I've ever written. No organization, no coherency. Aw, man…

I'm going to go make an AMV. It ought to turn out better.


End file.
